So, I got a package in the mail from my eldest sister today, a birthday present. Twelve copies of a craptastic little pamphlet by L. Ron Hubbard. Not one, twelve.
I want to send them back to her and tell her what I really think about her little cult, but I'm trying to restrain myself. See, a few weeks ago I included her on a mass email, and she responded with a "reply all" to my list of friends with some Scientology proselytizing. WTF??? [Wait! Why does my stupid Firefox spellcheck have "Scientology" in its database and not "WTF" or even "spellcheck?" Insidious mother fuckers.]
Yeah, so I wrote her back and told her not to proselytize to my friends, and probably for the first time in years, I let on about my real opinion on her beliefs. For those of you not familiar with how to deal with cult members--what I did is not a good idea.
I've been wondering, since, if she has ratted me out yet. She must have at least told her husband that I'm a "suppressive person," and he works for the "church." Pretty soon the church will ask her to sever her ties with the only family member who still maintains ties with her. Or the "church" will excommunicate her and she'll see what a sham her whole life was and she'll kill herself.
Ok, I'm exaggerating, but stuff like that happens. [And why the fuck is "ok" not in the god damned spellcheck database, but fucking SCIENTOLOGY is? I FEEL LIKE PUNCHING SOMEBODY JUST BECAUSE OF THAT!!! I mean, I remember reading in The Beach that "Coca Cola" is the second-most-widely understood word in THE WORLD, after "OK."]
In any case, I want to call my sister and tell her that I'm chucking these stupid pamphlets she sent me because I think they're dangerous for vulnerable people, and that along with the copy of Diuretics that she gave me, I've got A Piece of Blue Sky and Bare Faced Messiah on my shelf, that I've read all three and thought it through and decided which side I'm on.
Of course, that's a lie. All three are on my shelf, but I haven't read a one.
I should get to work. But damn I'm pissed. I just want my sister back...it's been, what, eleven years? Help me Steve Hassan!